Journey to Healing

20.12.2012
December 20th, 2012.

For some, this date looks strategic. for some reason. I, find it very normal.

Considering the news that i received this afternoon, i should call this date, well, there is no word enough to describe it.

At first, i was speechless. As usual, when we are in the state of trying to digest something or some news, some would be speechless. some, would cry straight away.

My tears only started to rain when a friend tried to console me in the car.

I know i need to be strong. Fight to survive. The survivors also told the same story. To stay positive. Be strong.

For some, this is a taboo subject.

But for me, it's easy for me to share. People say sharing is caring. I was thinking if the people around me knew what is happening to me, they may offer an advice or share tips and how-to in the journey to healing.

They may also lend support which i will greatly need sometime soon.

I am deeply touched by the words or gestures of support by friends and family so far. It's has only been one day. Heck, not even a full 24h.

Truth is, i am still trying to digest the news. I am still finding the core strength.
I am not afraid for me but every time i think of Oya and my family, i would cry. I am scared for Oya.

What if i go first? i know. Allah is great. but i can't help but feel sorry for her. I should be spending for her treatment , not mine. But i know, if i am gonna be OK, she is gonna be OK.

Hence, if you see me these few days or weeks, i may still finding all the positiveness and strength in me.
Forgive me if i cry in front of you. Forgive me for all my wrongdoings all together.

Please remind me to be strong. Be positive. Another phase of my life has started.
A new journey for me will begin tomorrow, Dec 21st. Let's hope i manage to get appt with Oncologist at PPUM.

The first news is broken. My Biopsy came out. I have Intrusive Ductal Carcinoma. Grade 2.

I have a tumour as big as 9cm. Yes, i have Cancer in my Right breast.

Lumpy December

It all started early 2012. I had detected a lump on my right breast in 2011 and upon seeing a Groupon promo for Pathlab Breast Check, me and fri3nds decided to go for one.



so, in Feb 2012, i did the ultrasound and resulted in Fibroedonoma which is just  lump of tissue with 1cm diameter. why hadn't i get it removed?
yes i should have consulted a Gynae or breast specialist alike.
I do have friends with cysts and fibro and with mixed stories and reactions, i came into conclusion that i can wait.

Fast forward few months after, i guess my first diagnosis could be wrong sibce it's already a huge lump now. for the past few months my PMS worsen and i could feel the pain.
Peeking into my referral letter from the clinic i could see it'S already become a 9cm lump. Yes physically i could see and feel thw difference. the signs.

Luckily, i am surrounded by good people in my life. The whole Valve management team including my HOD and Mr GM actually pushed me to see a GP they know well.

hence today i am in Sunway Medical Centre just completed my mammogram and waiting for ultrasound. Boley doctor tuh gelak bila aku tanya biopsy tuh sakit tak.jarum dicucuk2 kot...haiyaaa...

so friends before you come for such tests or any medical tests;please remember this:
1. Harras your GP for referral letter.without which comp insurance may not pay you back if you are on Pay and claim basis.

2. Make copies of your lwtter for you, HR ans neighbour.hhhe

3. Call your insurance for any info you might need like balance of your entitlement.

4. Make appt with your prwferred spwcialist.

5. Bring any medical record or test result.

6. identify if thwre is any family history including from which side. maternal or paternal. sebab kklau maternal gen dia kuat sikit. x silap ingatan aku la


If you're in for breast exam, you may need to do mammogram which is contrary to popular belief, not painful. uncomfortable yes.
pastuh sah2 kena tukar baju kan. terkial2 gak aku tadi siak. hehehe
kat SMC neh ada locker letak barang free dlm area Radiology.
so sementara menunggu harusla mengupdate kan.

lamanya ultrasound.lapar neh. nak biopsy lagi.

papepun wish me luck. no matter what is the result, hadapi nya dengan tenang and stay positive.if not for me, for Adam and Oya.

pix : later.dai

I am...scared.

The last time i was this scared was during a teambuilding in Perak. I am afraid of height and cringes every time i look down from a building. Even from a first floor.Ironically, i live on the 4th floor of my apartment building. kan?

Yes, i have the same feeling all over again although i am nowhere near any edges or climbing anything.

It's the unknown that can make us restless. Wondering. What if...

For the 1st time in my life, i am scared and afraid for someone else. Not for  me.at least, most of it.

Let Dec 19th opens the path to the unknown.

If you happen to see me today, please don't ask why or what. I may cry. As i have only indulged to some people, i do not wish to disclose the full extent of the whole story yet.

Just letting you know, i am afraid.

Insyaallah, everything is gonna be just fine.

Kampung ku ada Earthquake u ollss!

Okay. U might say "aaaaa?" or "whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?"
Not a feature topic in our local newspaper but try googling "Gempa bumi di keningau". U might see this:

Actually, sikit je pun 1.9 and 3 magnitud je. tapi enough untuk mengejutkan orang sebab yela,jarang2 ada kan. what? memang jarang2 tapi pernah. not the first time.ce google.

Anyway, tak payah la nak fikir lebey2, pengajaran la, dosa la, pesta seks la.
dah memang Keningau tuh dekat Banjaran Crocker and terletak dalam kawasan sesaran tanah. again, please google.

Ha tuh dia location gegaran tuh...

so, no worries yeah..insyaallah. everything's gonna be okay..

eh..gambar bawah neh? saja nak menyelit2 je..depan rumah aku punya view daaa...

neh la town Keningau dari atas bukit..

dalam FB aku banyak lagi. carik sendirik!

KPI dalam Blog.BLeh?

So okay.
Hoooray today i manage to drag myself and drove to work. It's friday 23rd and Division meeting was scheduled today.by me.
After MC on mon,tue and Thurs due to fever, it felt like ive left office for 3 weeks.

anywau. Like ppl say. Ada hikmah disebaliknya. kena buat Appraisal for fy11/12. and i need to appraise like 7 orang! aiyorrrkkkkl....its 2.25pm and submission is at 3pm. blank.

whatever its worth. Kak Kim,its waaaayyyy from boring. Please keep writing.

and Ila.you too.

and the rest.join me. boleh komen mengomen.ok?

The one with MC tak jadik.

Dah dua hari demam. Aku masih kerja. Bukan nak tunjuk hero.

tapi banyak benda pending.

While contemplating "work or no work", sms masuk kata ada orang MC.

Hence, aku decide masuk keje je la.

Which by the way, weekend aku akan lagi tenang sebab aku tau keje tuk minggu neh dah settle.

Yang x setel, mencarik orang untuk diinterview.

bila nak benti keje neh? aku pun tatau.

The lesson that i've learnt for the past 2 weeks?

Sympathize, emphatize and move on.

Dwelling on issues without prospecting for solutions is not the best way.

Face your issues. Never turn away from problem.

LAGI TUNGGU, lagi sengal jadiknya.

anyway, esok badminton neh. ada tournament opens for TW staff only.

boleh main ke neh? insyaallah boleh.

menang tak menang lain citer.

Hadiah? RM400/Person for juara. RM200/person for naib.

Kita ada double jek. Male, female & mixed.

Kalau dapat, leh masuk bank..atau masuk perut.

Dalam camera ada pix yang takdela menarik pun.

Tapi mungkin menarik untuk sesetangah orang.

Meh kita upload.

Tart telur dengki dengan aku.

Oi. aku nak iron baju la!!

Meja temporary aku. Monitor sampai 2?

Budak2 yg BANAYK KEJE TP WAT2 MELEPAK...ekekek

Helmi-boy's first sales consultation.

Telinga ultra boy.

er.....hm.....apa motif ek..

Eh dabes?

moral of the story punya blog ini:

Berani buat, berani tanggung.

Hidup dah la sementara tapi kita kene buat sebagus boleh

untuk diri kita jugak,

Nawaitu untuk bekerja kena betul.

Segala2nya kerana Allah SWT.

Insyaallah, jalan akan kembali lurus dan benar.

The One with Kunanang NanoNano

Nope. I have nothing to do with Hafiz's AF Awan Nano song.

Neither do i co-published iklan gula2 Nano-Nano.

Kunanang comes from a childhood name. Nana & Sujana = Kunanang?

It's a nama panggilan or more to nama ejekan by my friends back in much-loved kampung.

I think almost eveyone has their own name such as:

Eterrt = Betet

Bibah  = Gibbel

Harun = Tunggarun

Lela = Lalat

Ila = hmm..i forgot. anyone?

Ipah = Giput

to name a few..

anyway, ejek or no ejek, it's actually unconsciously a very passionate act towards our friends and family.

Bak kata melayu "tak kenal maka tak cinta". We won't call em by their "passionate" names if we don't know em deeply, ait?

Back to my name.

Nano-Nano was a fofular advertisement back in my childhood years.

I'm not sure if it still runs in our local TV network.

But it goes like this:

“nannoo nana nano nanoo nana nano nano nana nano nanoOo....
oh…nano nano, saya suka, saya gemar, rasanya seeedappp...
manis, masam masin, gula-gula, nano nano....Nano NaoooooOOO
Gula-gula Nano nano....!!”

Read more: Imbas kembali: 10 iklan yang tak boleh lupa | ! CIK TOM !

Hence, kawan2 dan saudara mara aku yang bijaksana telah memberi aku nama

KUNANANG NANONANO mcm header aku & my FB account.

So, hopefully, it will answer the not so many questions i have about my name.

and today, Azreen couldn't find my name in FB. Suddenly, HelmiBoy mentioned that nama aku akan dok atas skalik kalau search "Kunanang" Betul la!

Ewah..mcm la ada effect ke atas cuaca dunia pown..

papehal..takde hal pon.

The one friday in April

 Sengaja aku kecikkan gambar budak neh..agak2 pernah tgk camera tak?

Husna, Anis & Danyl
First time Anis pakai baju kurung to office.
Manis pown!!
JAP..EH...dracula mana dok tepi tuh??? Boleh jek jadi model braces kot.
laku tuh.
Apa Husna wat kat sini?
Training..kumpul duit alllowance.

Budak pasan. But gambar neh diambik sebab?

dia dan Azreen pakat nak minum Ribena kot ini hari :P



Ribena Gegerl
Nihla Azreen. Budak ECO on-job training kat HQ.
Balik ECO? tgkla bila aku kata bila bole balek :D



These happy faces belongs to Eunique, Afiq & Anak kambeng.

Afiq, silala score mcm AHMAD FADHIL MISIAH ye.

ko settle wa punya BOM, lu konpom wa bagi 100%.

sekian.

Anak Dara yang rajen skali.

Project compilation la tuh.

Project apa? RAHSIA KERAJAAN LANGIT.

Aku pun terkejut tgk CIK-DARAH MANIS pakai baju kurung kaler hijau neh.

mcm nak gi kawen dah neh. Takyah kot tunggu mid-april. sebab aku takleh gi :D

So , moral aku menulis hari ini?

Marilah sensitif kepada persekitaran kita :-/ Dan jangan bagi Husna & Azreen balek ECO lagi.

Nanti Azreen asyik ber BBM ngan kari ayam.

sekian.

The Kundang of 5

5pcs and i had to stop myself. These are delicious, but hello, ada jugak yang beri2 kang esok.
what i didn't know was, unripe Kundang looks like this:

(Photo courtesy of http://hanieliza.fotopages.com/)

Info on Buah Kundang is here.

This is the 1st entry for today. i write because i need to let something of my chest. But how would i do so when i can't even spell it out? If i did, some people in my life would be...surprised?
Usually, when i worry about something or something is bothering me. i clean.
I will do chores that i usually does once a week. This will be a good time for people to come over because my house is clean.

Yes, i am worried. and surprised. and sad a little. but damn! i just can't shout it out loud.
see? i also got feelings. Nama jek ganas but dalam hati ada taman baiii....tak caya?
Tengokla statistics yang kengkawan aku vote. peliknye, ada jugak orang yang AKU TAK KENAL and not in my friendlist vote jugak. ekekke...

Hence, i sumbat my mouth with above kundangs after the cleaning session.
watching TV didn't help because there was a thriller movie "Amusement" on HBO.

but wait, who are the people whom wll be surprised if i did spell what's bothering me?
Generally, i divide the people in my life into 5 sections:
1. Family.
2. Hi-school friends.
3. work colleague
4. Orang Kampung & such.
5. People i know who does not belong to the above group.

crap. maybe my equation wasn't right. Maybe it needs revision.
Maybe i should just hit the bunk.
At right about...now.

The Sale

AirAsia sale lagi! harga yang aku tau yelah:

KL-SIEM REAP: RM200++ pegi balik, March 2012. ermm..lama gilak!

Sapa nak pegi SIEM REAP ngan aku? takde? ok.

Hari neh rasa nak menulis sesuatu. Tajuk? takde. cuma dari tadik ada sesuatu yang bermain di fikiran aku yang amat senak ini: Kalau orang tak komen blog atau FB, kira tak glamer ke apa?
Buat apa nak glamer? Perluke orang komen? Perluke aku follow blog/tweet orang lain yang takde kene mengene ngan hidup aku kecuali kalau aku suka cara dia berblog.
lagipun, kawan2 aku ramai yg SILENT READER. Tup tup bila jumpa jek atau bila kat opis jek "eh, apa yg ko post semalam tuh ek? mana ko dapat?"
Kiranya depa dok baca gak la.
Kesimpulannya -> aku belum makan lunch sebab tuh aku mcm neh.

Anyway, cakap pasal sale, aku tak berani nk kemana2 warehouse sale sebab nnanti aku soping punya. 2 bulan neh banyak sikit aku guna duit termasuk menabur berhengget2 kat jalanraya dan member anak2 ikan aku makan. hahahha. ye la tuh! Budak2 cikedis kat opis la. Tapi mereka akan ku kerah tenaga untuk mencapai wawasan 2020 aku minggu ini.ngeeeee.

Mana plak sale barang2 baby neh? sebab nak carik stroller untuk Ida lepas kompol duit budak2 division. Kalau masyuk, bolela beli yg masyuk. Nih infor yang ambik dari sini:

Baby & Kids Expo ' 11

28 April - 1 May 2011
Stadium Shah Alam (Inoor)
http://orie.com.my/
Public - Free Admission


2nd Mom & Baby Expo 2011
6 - 8 May 2011
Halls 1, 2 & 3
Today Publishing
http://www.todaypublishing.com.my/
Public - Free Admission

Kalau Warehouse sales dalam masa terdekat kat ShoppingnSales:

1. Baby product Sales, 30Mar-10Apr --> Mcm takde jek benda yg aku leh carik.
2. Anakku, 20Mar-3Apr.--> Stroller Anakku, ada ke?

Kat PASIM pun, lebey kurang jek samanya.

Beli jek la kat Mothercare. Aci?

The Blast from the Past

Pehal plak malam2 neh ber-sentimental plak aku neh.

Tapi teringat zaman2 kanak2 riang dulu especially masa sekolah rendah.
I went to Sekolah Kebangsaan Luagan, Keningau, Sabah in 1985 when i was in std 2 from another nearby school. There's nothing much i can remember except for a few vague images here and there.

Initially, I was not "accepted" by the members of Class A since i was a transfer from Class B after i aced the English test (hahahah..ace tuhhh). but kids will always be kids.After a while, we became friends. Dolly, Rafidah, Faridah, Fadilah, Ernie, Kamasius, Patriah, Dayana, Hamrun and later Rozita. Cikgu Rayner, Cikgu Mary, Cikgu Bob (in training at that point of time) and Cikgu Idris. Funny, i can't seem to remember the rest.

Maybe i wasn't that close to the rest of the class. Or it's just maybe i didn't actually have communicated with them after we parted at all.

The thing that i still remember well are :
1. the soto which cost about 50cents a bowl at that point of time. Cheap!
2. I got a history-based storybook - Peristiwa Pasir Salak- for being the 1st in class in std..4 or 5.:-p It was the start of my interest in history.
3. There was a kid-pageant-thingy when i was in std 3 and i remembered my friend Dell wore a batik-kebaya attire.
4. I once wore a gown to school sports event.hahahah. and i nearly got a place in the school 100m meter team. Why? i did run in a suka-suki race and got 1st place but the trial for the team was already over.
5. Std 6 - i cried otw to school due to "sakit kaki". We had to "lompat kotak" satu padang because we couldn't memorise the sifir..hahah
6. I got 4A-1B in UPSR.1B for writing. My handwriting..was and maybe still is...bad..
7. A friend of mine wore pinafore to school and later had to go back early since she got her 1st period in std six-at school.
8. I remembered Cikgu Idris personally coached a few of us for UPSR and personally brought us to Yayasan Sabah office  to fill-in forms for the YS placement in boarding sxhool in Peninsular Malaysia.Thank you cikgu!

what else...hmm...how i wish i had photos of those days..i kinda miss those kids ..i don't think i will ever recognise them again..whom memories, faces and friendship seem so distant and became a thing in the past.

The cakap-cakap

Something good via mass email :-)

Renung2kan dan selamat beramal :-)

Kata Profesor Ungku Aziz - betul ke???

Aku? dalam category mana? jengje jeng!!!

The Missing Ones

Via email today, i know a certain kid named Adam Shah is missing. Poor kid! Questions i may have but this unfortunate event require no more questions than there is.

From another blog, there is more than meets the eye. Read on but remember, we're not here to judge. Let's pray for his safety and courage for his family during this challenging period.

Talking about challenge, another email today presents its challenge to Transwaterians.

A badminton tournament for the staff will be held on April 9th & 10th.Me, myself, for whatever reasons duly filled in the form and join the women double league. 

My partner will be Aiza. Lucky me! I guess.and for her, lucky or not, she just has to play for the RM400/winner prize..wohoooo..

Syed Afisol suddenly wants to join the mixed double and his partner? me! (that is if the committee allow last minute entry). and i jokingly volunteer to be our dear Director's partner...argghh where was my conscience...nay...i don't think he'll agree..ha

hahah

Work is getting mundane nowadays. Don't get me worng. I love my work.I still ..like going to office.

Maybe because i just need to get things done. I'm not deemed as workaholic..am i?

But...i think (lemme think)  need a break..but then again, it maybe tempo

rary..maybe.

Just maybe, i can figure this out later tomorrow during the 2-hours Stress & you talk...

Yeah. A doctor is coming to TW tomorrow..we'll see how it goes..

So, what are the missing ones?

1. Adam Shah

2. My enthusiasm to play 

(actually, yes,i just filled in the form because i like filling in forms)

3. My eagerness to send Oya to school. It rains in the morning nowadays.

Not that i'm complaining ...  (damn the traffic)

4. The Spark. What? I work, yes, quite with enthusiasm but play time? 

I'm so getting older sooner than i thought.

5. there's something missing..but i can't quite figure it out...hmmm....

The dengungan..

MaLAM Tadi main futsal.
Letih sebab 4-5 orang je main satu pitch yang besaaarrr punya tuh.
Pompuan 3 orang..lelaki memang ramai la...
Kena main jugak sebab pitch ambik 2...takleh cancel..

main punya main, alamak, jatuh! Terduduk. Montot dah sakit.
Terbaring. Dan kepala terhantuk ke lantai.
adussss....risau gak..tapi tgkmla mcm mana sok...kalau agak2 rasa pelik, pegila klinik...

...dan aku pun tgh pening..
Ingat nak apply OUM. Tapi kelas dia mcm mana? mcm e-PJJ UiTM ka?
atau mcm UTMSPACE ka? atau mcm PLK UiTM?

Ishk ishk..kena kol jugak depa neh..
harap2 surat pengesahan majikn leh dapat cepat la...

hari neh belah petang ujan lebat. sudah nya?
Pegi balik futsal siap lalu Fed Hiway lagi..mcm nehla keadaan sampai rumah...muahahah..
neh accessories baru neh..half-cut pun kalah...

The Midnight Cake

Midnight.
2 hours ago i started liquidating the cheese and butter.
1 hour 34mins ago i started beating the egg whites.
1 hour 15 mins ago i started baking.

The egg-white was beaten to the peak.
The cheese mixture is ready via double-boil technique.

The cake tin and its' au-bain marie (waterbath) is ready.



..and into the tin the mixture went.

Voila! But dammnnnn! The Japanese Soft Cheesecake is indeed soft BUT it's soggy and did not rise to the height it was supposed to!!!
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Why?
1. My au-bain marie technique was not perfect.
Water leaked into the cake tin.
Water level to high or the aluminum foil bocor.

2. 20 mins into baking, i just realised that i put in COLD WATER!!! I was to put in HOT WATER into the waterbath..again...arghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

3. After realising the water was cold, without thinking, i took the tin out of the oven.
i wanted to change the cold water with hot water.

4. Maybe the egg white was over beaten.
It was supposed to be SOFT PEAK.
I think i did it until Stiff peak. arghhhhhhhhhhh!!!

The recipe can be found here and anywhere else in the cyberworld.
(Bunyi orang frust!)

2nd attempt: DEFINITELY will do it again. when???

Then, i was like, what the hell!! Leave it..it's done!!

The sedikit & sebanyak frust.

Apa punya title daaa....

Sikit frust? sebab CT takde. FD instead! adoi! bohsannya. dan scary nyeh. sebab? tungguuuuuuuuuuuuu...

Teasers

Lake Gardens (pix tadak)p

Sebanyak frust? PLANNED RE-U kat Cherating maybe cancelled..sob sob sob.tukar venue ke central. Initially, it was planned kat Cherating sebab nk cater for those frends dekat Pantai timur. Tup2, orng2 yang sama gak. citernye, orang2 yg sama neh ramai dari central.

so, we have like until 12 today nak decide. If at least 5 pax from pantai timur join and PAY, it's still gonna be in Cherating. The next venue maybe in Kuala Selangor idea from yours truly. I've been there tapi not to the beaches. Jalan2 Cari Makan at TV3 shows Kuala Selangor as food haven! voila...

The Mee Udang Banjir info can be found here and below images are from this link a well.




but it's not 12 yet. let's wait.

The One with the effort to relax

Tajuk best kan? tapi cannot do one!!!!!

Ive read this somewhere " the most effective way for parents to get their children's attention is by stayng put, sit down and look relaxed".

I managed to sit down. Managed to Lie down. Managed to Open the the romance book borrowed from Tini ages ago. Page 2.and Sofiya came. Adam knew it was better to leave me alone. But Oya? huh. Lambat lagi la tini aku abes buku kau tuh. Buku apa?

Ok. Work updates. Currently, 2 coordinators from ECO are on-job training in HQ. Under my supervision, my mission is to ensure they go back to ECO with new perception and image (not the wardrobe-change kinda thing).

Training them is part of the story. Both has different level of experiences and mode, speed and content of training differs much. The other part is, how am i gonna manage them when my own work is squeezing me on daily basis? hahahha...buat jek la...nak wat camno...

Speaking of work, a work-friend of mine is getting married next week in Kelantan.Hence, i 've decided to attend the one in Juasseh, the groom's kampung. When i mentioned this to some of my colleagues, they were like, "malulah, tuh kan rumah lelaki. pegila rumah perempuan!".

Numero Uno: kalau member ko tuh belah pompuan, dan dia kawin kat Alaska sana sementelah rumah pengantin lelaki yang ko tak kenal cuma kat belakang umah ko, mana yg ko akan pegi?

Alasan kenal tak kenal neh akan menentukan bahagian mana kita pegi ke? how about logic? If both places are within distance we could reach, then by all means i would go to the bride's side.

Adat ke? mungkin ya. Tapi rasa yang lebih penting kat sini adalah menghadirkan diri setelah dijemput tak kira kat belah mana mengikut kemampuan semasa. By the way, the groom is also TWians what..hahahahh...hmm..ke dah resign?..konpius aku...

dan yg lagi mengkonpiuskan aku, HOW ON EARTH SOMEONE FINDS THIS KIND OF NATURAL CALAMITY A JOKE, SOMETHING FUNNY WHILE THERE ARE SUFFERING PRESENT? It's a shame!!

source: http://plixi.com/p/83588472

The Feel-like-Crying afternoon

Maybe i'm just tired.for today.
Maybe it's because of some of the sad statuses and newsfeed on my FB.
Maybe it's just one of those days with the homesickness.

yes. i still feel homesick. At 34 and 2 kids in tow? come on, some people would say.
Ask your Sabahan or even Sarawakian friends. Our speech will almost be the same. We miss home. Nothing beats home. There's no place like home. well,except for those whose family has fully migrated to the peninsular. and those who hates their hometown ;-)

In my case, i am missing a lot of happenings around my family. Weddings, births, engagements, convocation celebration, birthdays and even death. Well, i have been since i was 13 when i went to PM as a YS student in one of the boarding school here.It's a decision (...r u sure nana? heheh) i sometimes ponder, what has gotten into me 22 years ago? well, i was just a kid!! and flying to PM was just a finale to my fantasy, at that point of time. Imagine the KK airport was filled with sad atmosphere and the cry of a group of 13years old about to be apart form their family for almost one year. It was for most of us.

And how we spent the school holidays? Perkampungan!!! That was how we , the YS students, got together, got close and ease each others' homesick. Noooo..we were not allowed to go back except for the 1-month holiday at the end of the year! Our bond was special. We don't really share our lives together the way we shared it with our schoolfriends. But somehow, there's a bond between us that is still alive until today. Whether or not it's still being cherished,it depends on each individual. Each perkampungan has its own memories. Each time the venue would be different and the event would of course be unique.

Well, ff i hadn't accepted the offer though, i wouldn't have known the wonderful people i have known so far in my life. That my friend, is me, accepting my takdir.

crap. i've gotten so melancholic over these things this few days.
This will be a good time to watch some tear-jerking movies.

moving on!!!

Today afternoon was spent at UMMC. OT & Physio appointment for Sofiya.
As usual, the therapist will gauge her progress and/or improvement She has shown some improvement when it comes to walking attempts but it relies heavily on her own self motivation and mood! Mummy can only laugh la...

We will try to hold only one of her hand so that she will try to balance herself and she has tried something new today!

Usually, she would try praticising walking with Rollator. This usually priced at RM250.0-RM400.00. She has not got one because she seems to hate it and she can't balance herself yet.
Rollator is actually a walker which needs to be pushed while walking. It may come with or without seat and baskets.

This wheeled walking frame is designed for children who require support when walking. ... This walker is suitable for children with good upper body strength but limited stamina.

source: http://www.healthnme.com/images/adult%20child%20folding%20rollator.bmp

While Reverse Posture walker is something that sofiya actually likes because she has more balance and she can handle it. The price tag? from RM850.00 w/o seat, etc. I may need to get this for her.


.

source: http://www.assistireland.ie/eng/Products_Directory/Walking_Standing_Devices/Walking_Frames_-_Wheeled/Wheeled_Standard_Frames/Children/Meyland-Smith_Henry_Walking_Frame.html

walking frame that offers support from behind the user to encourage correct trunk position and an upright posture. The frame has anti-slip wheels to prevent backwards movement, but has an override feature that allows forward and backward walking when required. The frame has swivelling front wheels that can be locked to prevent the frame from moving when not desired.

We'll see how it goes. Let her choose which one is comfortable for her but i have a gut feel that the reverse walker suits her better.

Well, since JKM is not providing one, looks like i have to build one for her or buy her one.

The One with the blues.

Apasal layout blog aku sama ngan JANNA? tak kesahla.

Pagi neh aku sungguh emo. bawak keta pun sungguh emo. tapi yang pelik. mulut aku sopan pagi neh! atau mungkin aku jeles tgk Sofiya makan roti+cheese+hotdog kat sebelah?haish.
Kenapa emo?
1. Marah dengan orang yang tak reti menghargai orang lain.
2. Marah dengan orang yang memberi jawapan sampah bila kita meminta pendapatnya.
3. Marah dengan diri sendiri yang terlalu bodoh untuk meneruskan...

hambek. sapa terasa, nasibla.
macam la ada sesapa terasa pun.

moral of the story, pagi2 jgn buka atau pikir mende2 yang bole membuatkan kita emo.

astaghfirullah.

dan hati jadi sayu bila terbaca blog MERAH TINTA.
Kesian adik neh. Kenapa sampai nak tukar sekolah dari SBP ke Non-SBP?
KL/Selangor area kan banyak lagi sekolah termasuk sekolah terchenta, Sek Men Sains Selangor.
Kalau aku ada body kat KPM tuh, aku dah push2 tuk process application budak neh cepat. Kalau boleh, tukar request dia dr sekolah biasa ke SBP. Then, bagi biasiswa atau loan.

senang aku cakap kan? tapi tak boleh ke? kitakan MALAYSIA BOLEH?
boleh punya.

P/S Bagus jugak berblog neh. boleh melempiaskan ketidakpuashatian di jiwa. drpd bercakap.hmmmmm....

The one with Friendlist.

What would you feel if you found out that you are being removed from a friendlist, say Facebook? Well, we have myspace, friendsters and many more in which i don't have any accounts with.

Surprised.
Irritated.
Sad. some would say.

But hey, if they don't wanna be friends with you anymore, so? Why would we be sad for someone who is truly not a friend?

Maybe, just maybe, i may question some of my friends if i were to be removed form their list. Especially if i've known them for a very long time. Frankly, i simply wouldn't care if they're form my workplace i have been befoe and currently am. Most of them are simply mutual friends. We share our worklife and may even share some afterwork activities together. I find myself only really cherishing only a handful of them. Criteria? heheh.

well, why? because i found most of them, fake. Some of them are not sincere. and some, give me the total stranger's feeling even though i have known them for quite some time.

Maybe i used to like making friends and keep them in the circle. But now? i simply like to make friends and could't really care what they think.I sound just like someone's who's been dumped or something. hahah. Come on. I'm getting older and si simply couldn't afford to have irritating people around me. It makes me...feel and look old :D ngeeeeeeee...I've decided not to have negative energy around me and i am learning to do so ..

Hence, to those who feels like removing me from their friendlist for any platform esp FB, pls do so. I would understand and i simply don't care. Because you don't.